Soul Happy

I pulled on my tall winter socks, then my fleece lined cycling tights. Next came the base layer and the fleece cycling jacket in visibility pink.  My heart fluttered with excitement.  Shoes, shoe covers, skull cap, buff.  Heated gloves with mittens over the top.  Helmet with helmet light.  Clear glasses to protect my eyes from the cold wind.  

It was March 20.  First full day of spring.  First dawn patrol ride of the year.  It was 36 degrees at the house, but I knew the temperature would drop as the sun peeked over the mountains.  I grabbed my water bottle, hoping it wouldn't freeze shut on the ride.  I mounted my head light and tail light, rolled my bike out of the garage.  The cold air hit me like a wall, but I didn't care.  Dawn patrol is my jam.  It's my thing.  It is my fully immersive, all senses heightened, soul happy time to ride.  

I clipped in and shoved off, turning right on the highway smack into a headwind.  The legs immediately protested, so I shifted into and easier gear and spun, letting my body warm up as I gazed to the east, searching the horizon for a hint of day light.  

I kept spinning into the wind, feeling my muscles start to loosen and my body temperature slowly rise.  I could see eyes reflecting my headlamp, some low to the ground, some higher.  Deer for sure.  Maybe house cats out on dawn patrol like me.  Maybe racoons.  The eyes stared at me as I pedaled by.  I gazed back silently, tilting my head down slightly as to not blind them with my light.

The highway was quiet.  A random car here and there would pass by slowly, cautious of animals crossing the road.  Three miles along and I turned off onto a two lane road with even less traffic.  In the darkness, my other senses heightened.  I could hear rustling in the trees, birds awakening for morning song.  I could smell the musty scent of large animals, probably elk, but I could not yet see them.  I kept pedaling, spinning along, enjoying the quiet as the eastern sky grew lighter by increments.  Dawn seemed a long time in the making, and I loved it.  That time between dark and light is my favorite time of day.  I wished it would last forever.  

I reached my turn around point before I was ready.  I pulled off the road onto a driveway and stood silently for a few moments, allowing the sounds of the waking day to embrace me.  The river flowed by, smooth and quiet, little riffles here and there, still edged with ice in places.  A blue heron flew silently overhead as geese honked noisily from the nearby pasture.  Robins scurried in the trees, busy doing their robin chores.  I inhaled deeply, the faints scent of pine filling my body down to my toes.  If I could only hold this moment forever...

The clock was ticking so I clipped in.  The wind was at my back now, the hand of Mother Nature pushing me effortlessly towards home.  With the faster pace, the cold air stung my face and made my eyes water.  I pedaled harder in an effort to generate more heat, feeling my legs respond smoothly.  

Dawn was breaking now, and I could clearly see my surroundings.  The light was soft, secretive, magical.  As I rounded a corner, I slowed to watch a small herd of elk cross the road in front of me, water dripping off of their bellies from the river they had just forded.  I smiled.  Hi guys!  Good morning!  They glanced at me, floated over the roadside fence one by one, disappeared into the trees.  I pedaled on.

I felt the stress, anxiety, and worries fall away onto the road behind me, shattering as they hit the pavement.  I spotted another small herd of elk ahead and slowed, smiling, inhaling their musky scent as they slowly crossed the road.  Energy and happiness filled my core as the tail wind pushed me ever closer to home.

Too soon, I turned into my driveway, shivering and bursting with joy.  Every ounce of my being was happy.  Every bit of my soul was filled to the brim.  I felt as though I had shared a secret with the forest animals, and it was ours to share forever.  Mother Nature has a way of healing, even if we don't know we need to be healed.  

I stripped off my many layers and stepped into a hot shower, thankful for the heat.  My mind remained in the soft light of dawn with the elk and the heron.  I knew the feeling would fade as my day wore on, so I held it close, savoring the peace.  The dawn would call again the next morning, and the next, and I was excited for every moment of it.